Sir
by csiAngel
Summary: Companion piece to 'Carter'. Post-ep 3.17. There had been an awkwardness between them since his return from Edora...


Title: Sir  
Author: csiAngel  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Companion piece to 'Carter'. Post-3.17. There had been an awkwardness between them since his return from Edora...  
Disclaimer: I do not own Stargate SG1.  
A/N: This piece is intended to be read after 'Carter' though it takes place simultaneously.

... ... ...

Sam hated that she felt relieved when Colonel O'Neill bid her good night and moved to leave her lab. But there had been an awkwardness between them since his return from Edora and, though she knew it was irrational and unwarranted, she couldn't seem to push past it. She couldn't shake the memory of how much she had missed him. Or the way he had walked away from her to speak to Laira; the way he had hugged Laira; the look of sadness on his face when he had returned with them.

It made sense that he had made a life there. After all, the Stargate was buried. How was he to know that she - _they_ would not stop until they found a way to bring him back?

She bit back the anger that stirred: He should have known.

"Carter..."

His voice startled her and she cursed her distracted mind. She hadn't realised that he was still there.

"Yes, Sir?" She hoped that she had managed to look and sound completely normal.

He took a step into the room. "Are you okay?"

Maybe she hadn't been very successful at 'normal'. But she would persevere. "I'm fine, Sir."

He appeared to consider that for a second. She tried not to hold her breath.

"You sure?"

"Yes, Sir. I'm fine." She made sure she smiled to lend credence to her statement. But when he looked like he might ask again, she tried a diversion. "Sir, are _you_ okay?"

"I'm fine... I'll let you get back to work."

She forced another smile and turned back to the device SG-7 had brought back from their latest mission. And she tried to ignore all thoughts pertaining to the Colonel.

She failed. Mainly because he didn't move. She tried to concentrate; hoped he might get bored.

"Carter..."

She looked up. "Yes, Sir?" The same, feigned normality.

He moved a step closer. "Aren't you intrigued as to why I asked?"

She shook her head. "No, Sir." She knew full well why he had asked. But he didn't need to -

She realised belatedly that she _should_ have been intrigued. Damn it.

He spoke before she could even consider backtracking.

"Because you know that you're not fine."

And damn him.

"I am fine, Sir." She noticed that she had sat up a little straighter, hoped that he hadn't spotted it.

"Carter..."

"Sir?"

Had she said 'Sir' too many times in this conversation? Constantly reminding herself that he was her commanding officer, that they were Air Force, had started after a conversation with Janet when he was missing. It couldn't be a problem.

"Thank you."

Had she missed something? "Sir?"

"For finding a way to bring me back from Edora."

That threw her. He hadn't mentioned the rescue at all. Hadn't thanked her. Not that she expected it.

"Of course." She was careful not to add 'Sir' again.

"I should have thanked you before now. I'm sorry I didn't."

She felt a wave of relief wash over her and admitted to herself that she had been concerned that he was angry at her for bringing him back.

She shrugged before she let too much show. "You don't need to apologise, Sir."

"No, I do… I should have thanked you. I'm sorry I didn't."

He was making this difficult. "Okay. Thank you, Sir." She prayed that was the end of it.

"I am glad to be back."

"I know." She forced the next words. "You were there for a long time, it must be difficult to adjust."

"A little... I didn't want you to think that I'm not grateful."

"I wouldn't - I _don't_ think that, Sir." She immediately regretted being so honest. Maybe this was becoming a problem.

"Okay. Good."

He smiled so she smiled back.

"I'll let you get back."

"Yes, Sir."

She turned away and attempted to look so enthralled that he really would go. She did feel a little better knowing that, at least, he was glad to be back. She hoped he could tell that and wouldn't need to pursue this any further. She would get a handle on her - what? Jealousy? Disappointment? - eventually and things would go back to normal.

"Carter..."

She managed to stop herself from sighing. But she knew it took longer than it should for her to drag her gaze up to his.

"Yes, Sir?"

He walked towards her, further into the lab than he had been for the rest of their conversation. It made her wonder what he was going to do. Say. What he was going to say.

He stopped at a reasonable distance and she was determined not to be disappointed.

"I shouldn't have given up on you."

Her breath caught, tears prickled at the back of her eyes. He had found the root of the problem. And he hadn't just ignored it. She couldn't help smiling. Yes, he might just mean professionally, but there was something in his eyes. He knew how that statement could be interpreted.

If she wanted to.

She could deny that she thought he had given up. She could continue to try to act like none of it had affected her. Or she could do him the courtesy of the same ambiguous honesty that he had just offered her.

"Well… maybe next time you won't." That was precariously close to the line. "Sir."

She saw his lips twitch as if to smile, but he fought it. And, appropriate or not - _insane_ or not - her heart skipped a little. She was in trouble.

Granted, she felt a lot better but sensed that they had shifted from 'awkward' to... 'aware'. She doubted that was going to be an easier state.

He looked like he might speak but then he just nodded and said - again - that he would let her get back to work.

And this time he did.

Which, she admitted with a private smile, was probably wise.

THE END


End file.
